Some day, I will build the world's largest airplane made only out of SPAM. When the press asks me why I did it, I will smile at them, wink and hand them each a copy of Treasure Island. That moment will stay with them the rest of their lives. Also, then I won't have to explain my reasoning to them... because odds are I won't have a good reason. That will be the best and worst day of my entire life.
I can't wait.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Cogs in a Really Big Wheel
My grandpa always used to say chivalry wasn't dead. But grandpa was wrong. Chivalry was my grandpa's dog that died when grandpa was a child. Chivalry was SO dead. Needless to say, grandpa wasn't all there.
Okay, so that's not a true story at all; however, I think it shows how clever I am. I'm so funny.
Right, so that whole taking things day by day thing? I've had better days. Also, I've had much worse days. Things are never so bad as they seem, and they don't really even seem that bad. Optimism... I think it's one of those things that gets a person through life. How can anything make you unhappy if you see the best in everything. That's me. I see so much good in everyone I know. The people I know are incredible. They really are. And all of the good things about them are so much more amazing and extraordinary than any negative trait they could ever have.
If you can make me smile, you are a gift from God. If I can't be mad at you, it's because you bring so much happiness into my life. If you are my friend, I would lay down my world for you. And I'm so passionate and serious about how much the people around me mean to me. So much of who I am goes into them.
Maybe too much.
My emotions are dependent a large amount on the emotions of those around me. If you're happy, I'm going to be happy. If you're sad, I'm going to sad that your sad. If you're angry, I'm going to feel for you and wonder what I can do to help you smile.
Because of this, I've learned that I have to not throw my emotions into the relationships I make with my friends right away. I cannot function as an unhappy person. I need to smile. God, I can't help but smile. So, if you're my friend, be happy with me. We'll get slushies and watch drunk people downtown. We'll build ant fortresses out of dry grass and refried beans.
I love having amazing friends. I would be nowhere without them. Oh Lord, I'm being ridiculously sappy. That's a new annoying trend in my writing. I'll try to remedy that soon.
Okay, so that's not a true story at all; however, I think it shows how clever I am. I'm so funny.
Right, so that whole taking things day by day thing? I've had better days. Also, I've had much worse days. Things are never so bad as they seem, and they don't really even seem that bad. Optimism... I think it's one of those things that gets a person through life. How can anything make you unhappy if you see the best in everything. That's me. I see so much good in everyone I know. The people I know are incredible. They really are. And all of the good things about them are so much more amazing and extraordinary than any negative trait they could ever have.
If you can make me smile, you are a gift from God. If I can't be mad at you, it's because you bring so much happiness into my life. If you are my friend, I would lay down my world for you. And I'm so passionate and serious about how much the people around me mean to me. So much of who I am goes into them.
Maybe too much.
My emotions are dependent a large amount on the emotions of those around me. If you're happy, I'm going to be happy. If you're sad, I'm going to sad that your sad. If you're angry, I'm going to feel for you and wonder what I can do to help you smile.
Because of this, I've learned that I have to not throw my emotions into the relationships I make with my friends right away. I cannot function as an unhappy person. I need to smile. God, I can't help but smile. So, if you're my friend, be happy with me. We'll get slushies and watch drunk people downtown. We'll build ant fortresses out of dry grass and refried beans.
I love having amazing friends. I would be nowhere without them. Oh Lord, I'm being ridiculously sappy. That's a new annoying trend in my writing. I'll try to remedy that soon.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
I am NOT a Boy!
Shocking, I know. Have you ever had that feeling where it's like your entire insides have fallen asleep... that tingly sensation that makes your breathe become strained and you get a little light-headed? Yeah, it's kind of like that... my life right now. Things have never been so wonderfully terrible and terribly wonderful. It's like I'm walking on daffodils.
It's like I've either made one of the best or one of the worst decisions I've made in a long time. And I'm going to go with best... just because I'm an optimist by nature. I will tell you something though. Being hopelessly romantic gets you nowhere as a girl. Let me stress, I am NOT a boy. However, if I were, I would be the best damn boy ever. Seriously. I am the best at thinking up awesome things guys should do for girls. It just doesn't transfer very well for things girls should do for guys. That's not the same playing field even.
So... I just now decided (like in the progress of writing this blog) that I will make a short(ish) list of things that I think are adorable romantic that guys do/can do/should do. I have a feeling this is going to be horribly cheesy. So, ahead of time I would like to apologize. Usually I'm much more sadistic.
Smile, tell girls WHY you like them, go on walks, flowers, random notes/text messages for no reason, show trust, tell jokes, have patience, make a big deal out of something that doesn't have to be... it shows you care, cook dinner, man up... most women really do love confidence, don't be arrogant, listen (as best you can), talk... no matter how much you think it's stupid to have to talk to people... it's a part of life... be willing to talk, don't take things too seriously... life comes quickly... take it as it is, treat her as an equal. I'm going to stop there.
And I'm sure, a million things exist that a girl can do for a guy. However, I am NOT a boy... therefore, I do now know what they want.
All that being said, I really don't know anything about anything. I'm just about as clueless as anyone. The first step to knowing everything is admitting that you know nothing. I know absolutely nothing. I never have, and I perhaps never will. But I am taking a little of my own advice right now. I'm taking each day as it comes... very happily. Today was great. I'll let you know about tomorrow.
It's like I've either made one of the best or one of the worst decisions I've made in a long time. And I'm going to go with best... just because I'm an optimist by nature. I will tell you something though. Being hopelessly romantic gets you nowhere as a girl. Let me stress, I am NOT a boy. However, if I were, I would be the best damn boy ever. Seriously. I am the best at thinking up awesome things guys should do for girls. It just doesn't transfer very well for things girls should do for guys. That's not the same playing field even.
So... I just now decided (like in the progress of writing this blog) that I will make a short(ish) list of things that I think are adorable romantic that guys do/can do/should do. I have a feeling this is going to be horribly cheesy. So, ahead of time I would like to apologize. Usually I'm much more sadistic.
Smile, tell girls WHY you like them, go on walks, flowers, random notes/text messages for no reason, show trust, tell jokes, have patience, make a big deal out of something that doesn't have to be... it shows you care, cook dinner, man up... most women really do love confidence, don't be arrogant, listen (as best you can), talk... no matter how much you think it's stupid to have to talk to people... it's a part of life... be willing to talk, don't take things too seriously... life comes quickly... take it as it is, treat her as an equal. I'm going to stop there.
And I'm sure, a million things exist that a girl can do for a guy. However, I am NOT a boy... therefore, I do now know what they want.
All that being said, I really don't know anything about anything. I'm just about as clueless as anyone. The first step to knowing everything is admitting that you know nothing. I know absolutely nothing. I never have, and I perhaps never will. But I am taking a little of my own advice right now. I'm taking each day as it comes... very happily. Today was great. I'll let you know about tomorrow.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
My Childhood Lacked Cutlery
Captain's log, Oct. 24, 2007... I have been lost at sea for approximately 2.2 years.
My friend Liz told me a story today about her grandpa holding a door open for her and saying, "Chivalry is not dead." I agree. However, I do believe a serious disease like typhoid, Ebola or asthma is posing a dangerous threat. I mean really guys, man up. I man up more than most guys, which is pretty sad because I don't even know how.
So... right now... this very second, I have come to the conclusion that I need to take life into my own hands... finally. For a long time I believed that if all of my faith rests in God then He will provide. Which is true! However, He doesn't provide packaged and wrapped with a bow answers. He provides opportunities. God gave us free will for a reason, and we will all use it incorrectly. It's called learning. It's called forgiveness. Sometimes, it's called starting over from scratch. Yet, the opportunities will always be there. Thanks for that J.C.
Lately, I've been making a lot of decisions that have rocked my safety boat. I feel great, like I'm standing in the center of the flame... like I'm breathing explosions.
So, right or wrong, thank you God for giving me this opportunity to stand on the edge without a life jacket... and just be. Your hands are so close I can hear them.
My friend Liz told me a story today about her grandpa holding a door open for her and saying, "Chivalry is not dead." I agree. However, I do believe a serious disease like typhoid, Ebola or asthma is posing a dangerous threat. I mean really guys, man up. I man up more than most guys, which is pretty sad because I don't even know how.
So... right now... this very second, I have come to the conclusion that I need to take life into my own hands... finally. For a long time I believed that if all of my faith rests in God then He will provide. Which is true! However, He doesn't provide packaged and wrapped with a bow answers. He provides opportunities. God gave us free will for a reason, and we will all use it incorrectly. It's called learning. It's called forgiveness. Sometimes, it's called starting over from scratch. Yet, the opportunities will always be there. Thanks for that J.C.
Lately, I've been making a lot of decisions that have rocked my safety boat. I feel great, like I'm standing in the center of the flame... like I'm breathing explosions.
So, right or wrong, thank you God for giving me this opportunity to stand on the edge without a life jacket... and just be. Your hands are so close I can hear them.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Happiness is When a Dove Puts Down its Gun
Ha... It has been a pretty superb month. Many things have happened. I've seen new and exciting places and done new and interesting things.
Some friends and I traversed to the beautiful apple orchards of Nebraska City... it was glorious. Also, just today we journeyed to Roca Berry Farms to look at and buy pumpkins. All in all, October has been amazingly resplendent.
I went home for fall break and got to see my family, some old friends and one of my sister's boy type friends. I've actually had the opportunity to meet several of these men on different, delightfully awkward, occasions.
So... this is just some catch up. I promise I write something witty and interesting later this week... or month.
Tons and tons of things have been going on. I'm happy... you can know that. Wonderfully happy... as usual. Also, it's so great to not know what's coming. Isn't it?
Some friends and I traversed to the beautiful apple orchards of Nebraska City... it was glorious. Also, just today we journeyed to Roca Berry Farms to look at and buy pumpkins. All in all, October has been amazingly resplendent.
I went home for fall break and got to see my family, some old friends and one of my sister's boy type friends. I've actually had the opportunity to meet several of these men on different, delightfully awkward, occasions.
So... this is just some catch up. I promise I write something witty and interesting later this week... or month.
Tons and tons of things have been going on. I'm happy... you can know that. Wonderfully happy... as usual. Also, it's so great to not know what's coming. Isn't it?