Love is like reading the Daily Nebraskan

In my poetry class recently, we were asked to associate love or nature through similies with something that is normally not used to describe either word. This is what I wrote, smiling.

Love is like pealing your toe nails off one by one by one.
Love is like reading the Daily Nebraskan.
Love is like being force to watch the Tele-tubbies: Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Lala and Po.
Love is like a nail through your shoe.
Love is like torture.

Granted, that is really angsty. I thought it would be more entertaining to associate love with really negative things. I kind of think it works; although, I don't necessarily believe those things.

I decided to make a pact to limite my facebook and internet time. So far, it has been unsuccessful. (Feel free to use this as a prime example.) But I found a beautiful song by Ingrid Michaelson that is really mellow and gorgeous. You can YouTube it if you want. The song is Called The Way I Am. But I really like the lyrics.

The Way I Am
If you were falling, then I would catch you
If you need a light, I'd find a match

Cuz, I love the way you say good morning
And you take me the way I am

If you are chilly, here take my sweater
If your head is aching, I'll make it better

Cuz, I love the way you call me baby
And you take me the way I am

I'd buy you Rogaine, when you start losing all your hair
And so on patches, to all you tear

Cuz, I love more than I could ever promis
And you take me the way I am

It's so simple, and it makes me happy. I'm really happy. I'm happy like a new pair of socks. I'm happy like sharing the covers. I'm happy like starting the day at 5 P.M. I'm happy like not wearing a watch. I happy like ecstacy, baby!

:) I'm done. :)

The View From the Ninth Floor

I'm seriously considering giving up facebook. The very thought frightens me half to death. Maybe I should just set a specific time every day that I am allowed to be on facebook. That would probably make more sense. But, it is my most accurate form of communication with the outside world. I facebook more than I use my phone... and just reading that lets me know what a HUGE problem I have. I'll be investigating this new facebook time limit within the next week.

In other news, I'm pretty sure that any day now I'm going to start figuring out my life. Eventually the pieces have to just fall together... don't they?

I really wanted to write something interesting today... thought provoking. However, I'm starting to realize that isn't happening. Right. That sucks.

Okay, well... these are the really big things on my plate right now: Peace Corps, Teach for America, Camp Kitaki, and internship, grad school and marriage. I'm going to do at least three of things for sure. The only question is: Which three (or more)? So I'm 99% sure on the last two... and camp. But what about the others? Oh Lord, it gives me a bit of a headache to think of it.

My room is lonely, and I'm starting to think more and more about what I want instead of what I need. I am an idiot wrapped in a moron... a stupid person. Lord save me from my own bad judgement. Introduce me to the future.

NOTICE
I decided that I would dedicate all day to reading the four entire books that I was supposed to read last week. This is what my day looked like. I woke up a 12:30 P.M. I picked up the Iliad. I read maybe 20 pages, and then I took a nap. Afterward, I perused facebook, investigated futon sales in Lincoln and researched plane ticket costs for spring break. It is now 11:15 P.M. In all today, I read a 70 page play for my mass media law class and about 60 pages of the Iliad. In recap, that is a terrible waste of a day. I really didn't do anything else other than waste time.

I really am a happy person... I promise.

Bad Poetry... Oh noetry!!!

So I'm posting these against my better judgement. Not because I don't want people to read them... please, I love people to read my poetry... but because I need to be doing my homework. Oh well! Here's to failing college!

Continental Drift
I am trapped
in northern california
with
Creeley and Blaser

A lemon is
a lemon
aleman
amen.

But my soul is a lemon.
So
is my foot.

To surpass the existential
is to find the
essential.

NYC rescue me
to reality.
All the lemons
shrivel in the
sun.

Not What I Do
The silence of my surrender
is so loud.
Ears pulsating under the pressure.
A series of bad decisions.

Holey sole tattered and forgotten
next to the welcome
mat
and flip-flops.

And the distance from A to B
does not equal
the distance from B to A.

Hold my hand...

Sprinklers and cold
cement
in late July.

Sucking it up.
Soaking it up.

The laughter of a lonely gazelle.

Vesuvius
The mouth of the volcano
trembling
the wanderer
thickly
slides down
woody
stubbled
slopes.
Dwelling
within the cavern
of smog
steam

Lingering
to unearth
mud
bubbling
to the surface.
Aggravating
plains
for the
greater
good.

Oh So Beautifully Flawed

I made a list of character flaws... or maybe they are just insecurities... I'm not quite sure how to classify them. And you may be thinking, "Why would you make a list about bad qualities you have?" It isn't like a form self-deprecation. It's recognition. It's acceptance. It's saying this is who I am... and if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best (thanks Marilyn.)

I am messy.
I can't sit still.
I tell people when they are being stupid.
I'm afraid of butterflies.
I'm afraid of bugs in general, the dark, heights, scary movies, the doctor, death, etc.
I wear sweatshirts to reduce the anxiety in my every day life.
I don't always let on how much I know, so that way people don't expect as much from me.
I wear to much black.
I waste money.
I over analyze things.
I go through complete conversations in my head before they happen.
I go through complete conversations in my head after they happen.
I don't think before I speak.
I tell the same stories over and over again.
I'm a really confident insecure person.
When I do laundry I separate clothes by what I will and won't wear.
I like gossip.
I don't always follow the same standards I have for others.
I make decision I know are bad.
I don't always wear matching socks.
I never make my bed.
I once made a list of my flaws. (*wink*)
I sign the words to songs as I walk around campus.
I bite.
I don't how far is too far.
I steal magnets from Sonic.

So, I probably have a lot more. But I'm pretty content with that list. Those are some flaws and quarks for you to know about me. It's who I am. I could make a list of good things too... but it might not be as good as I think... so I'll just let other people judge the good.

In theory, I like bears.

I am watching the first ever episodes of The Office right now... I am incredible... and modest. And I will put all of your thing in Jell-O very, very soon.

My bed is like a pile of squishiness. My feet are cold. My room smells like popcorn. I am looking at Stephen Colbert right now. These are random thoughts. Blah blah blah. I really don't have anything to say. It's almost fall now... but it's deceiving, because it's cold... but you can tell by the smell that fall's not here yet. The seasons are being tricky with me.

I do not approve of nakedness. My socks are green. My back hurts, cause I'm sensitive. I like to play games with people, but not mean ones... just annoying ones. My daisies still are prettiful. I think the idea of eye balls being sewn shut is revolting. I want to go to 13 concerts before May - an unatainable goal. I'm probably too affectionate, whatever that means.

I want to watch Little Miss Sunshine but the dvd is missing from its case. I think camp people are ridiculous. I think college people are ridiculous. I think my family is ridiculous. I like all of them a lot. Green is my favoritist color. I like sparkly things.

I heard that glitter is the herpes of craft products... I believe that.

I'll stop wasting your time... but please, please, please either waste mine or don't. No inbetweens.